1. How NOT to lose my stuff...ever...for any reason
2. How to loosen up...sort of
3. How to be a better momma
4. How to have fun
5. How to appreciate every moment given to me
K took the day off to spend with us doing whatever in the wide world we wanted to do. The 3 C's needed some entertainment, so we decided to drive down to the lake that's only 30 minutes from our house. K and C2 wanted to fish, and we three girls wanted to chillax under the pop-up awning with some good beach tunes. To be completely honest, I wanted to clean my house and not go anywhere or do anything. I had already spent an entire day off doing something else, and there were chores and laundry calling my name. K convinced me that there are times to make chores wait, and he would help by doing everything I needed done over the next 3 days he has off. I reluctantly agreed.
So, there we were. The boys took off for their fishing site while we girls sat in comfy lawn chairs, soaked up some sun, and listened to our tunes. C3 did her fair share of swimming right off the shore, as well as covering herself in mud, dancing like a fool, and hollering at me every 5 seconds to "watch this!" It was nice, I must admit. Even though C1 and I had spent the entire previous day outside at RCSO's Mud Mania (look it up...it's way cool!), we still enjoyed every second of the sunshine. After about 2 hours, the boys showed back up. Apparently, the fishing wasn't ideal--they didn't catch a thing. I snapped a pic or two, and we all discussed the dinner plans we had for the evening.
As C2 was telling me about fishing, he grabbed a water bottle from the ice chest, popped the top, took a drink, and looked at me funny.
"Momma, there's something wrong with this water. Can water go bad? I think mine did. It smells funny."
"Son, there's nothing wrong with that water."
"Momma, I'm serious. I think there is. Here, smell it." He tried to hand the bottle to me.
"No, boy. I'm not smelling your water. There's NOTHING wrong with it, I promise."
He looked at me this time with a sad/worried/freaked out look.
"Mooooommmmm, pleeeeeeeease? I'm serious! It smells weird!"
I gave him the biggest "mom annoyed with the world" face possible. He reached out to let me smell the bottle. Right as I stuck my nose to it and took in a deep sniff, that boy of mine squeezed the bottle.
I don't know that I can accurately describe to you what went through my mind at that very moment. All I know for certain is I was hit with a TIDAL WAVE of ice cold water. It shot up my nose, alllllll over my face and hair (I need to add that I had already done my makeup and hair for dinner, so that was now ruined), and down the front of my bikini top.
Ice. Cold. Water.
I came up from this tidal wave with mascara in my contacts and swearing like a sailor.
No. It was NOT funny! This was not fun and games! C2 had just destroyed all trust between us. I can no longer trust that sweet baby boy face pleading with his momma to "just smell the water."
Heck no.
Done.
I think I said words that haven't even been deemed as curse words yet.
I instantly demanded that everyone load up in the truck, because this mad-as-a-mother mother was heading home!!
The drive was a quiet one, to say the least. I think I heard C2 squeak out a "I'm really sorry, momma," but it was met with a death glare. C1 and C3 were just trying to fly under the radar. K was trying to control the laugh that was building up inside him.
Right about the time we turned in to the driveway, K said, "I'm sorry hon, but that was the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life!!" Every started dying laughing, except me. I just sat there with my grump face still on.
What in the world was I so mad about? It WAS funny. C2 got me good!
At that point, I was ashamed of my reaction to the situation. I was embarrassed that I cursed like I had. I wanted to just go to bed, pull the covers over my head, and pout.
So. Embarrassed.
As we all piled out of the truck, I grabbed C2 and hugged him. He is such a good boy. I can't be mad very long. I just let him in on a little secret...Momma is terrible with practical jokes.
Everyone was busy somewhere in the house, and I found myself staring in the bathroom mirror at what was once a nicely put together face and hair.
It was fixable.
I was not hurt.
I was just ashamed.
K came through and saw me standing there. He knew what I was thinking. What he said next changed my whole perspective...
"Hon, you know what? You're too hard on yourself. Way too hard. It's okay to not look perfect. It's okay that you raised a boy who's ornery and not perfect. It's also okay that you freaked out and cussed a little. We all have our moments. You're just too hard on yourself. It's okay to have fun."
What he said next hit me straight in the face, and it was just like being shot with ice cold water all over again...
"I'm not sure if I've ever told you this, but my daddy called me up one weekend and asked if I'd go to a funeral back home with him. We knew the family well--he wanted me there with him. I was off at college, and I'm sure there was a girlfriend that I wanted to hang out with, because I told him I couldn't go. Truth was, I could have gone, I just didn't want to. You know what? He died a week later. *Emotions began to rush through K and were visible in his expression* "Babe, don't ever take a single thing in this life for granted. Ya, your son messed up by squirting water in your face. But, at least you went to the lake with him. I know you're tired, worn out from being in the sun for 2 days, and you didn't really want to go, but I'm glad you did. You never know when it will be your last chance to do something with the ones you love. I miss my daddy so much, and he's been gone since I was 19."
I learned a lot yesterday.
I also realized that being too hard on myself or those I love is not okay.
Messed up makeup/hair or not, I'm choosing to enjoy what I have while I have it.
K and my 3 C's, y'all are my everything, in more ways than you know.
~Andy
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